Question:

Is it permissible for a woman to say to a man: ‘I love you for the sake of Allah’ — and vice versa? And is the supplication may our lord keep/preserve you ( ‘Rabbanā yakhallīk’ an error)?

Answer:

Al-ḥamdu lillāhi rabb al-ʿālamīn. To proceed:

 A woman should not  say such a thing except to a husband or to unmarriageable relative  (dhū raḥim maḥram). As for those whom it is lawful for her to marry, she should not say this to them, due to the temptation (fitnah) that may follow from it.

However, if a man is publicly committed and engaged in good works and in calling to Allah with insight and knowledge, and is well known for that — then there is no objection to the hearts of those who love goodness becoming attached to him and their love for him, settles in their hearts . The reward of those who love one another for the sake of Allah encompasses men and women alike — for the believing men and believing women are allies (awliyāʾ )of one another. Alliance(walāyah) encompasses several meanings that ultimately trace back to the love and support this love for the sake of a Allāh  increases as a person increases in faith and obedience to Almighty Allah , and receiving a reward does not require informing the person that one loves them for the sake of Allah.

If the risk of temptation(fitnah) can be safely ruled out — when expressing this love between a man and a woman—such as when the elderly is advanced in age, there is no fear of temptation on the woman’s part, personal contact between them is not possible, and it was simply a statement spoken in public—then there appears to be no harm in making that declaration, inshAllah.

In this regard, One woman sent a letter to Sheikh Abdul Aziz bin Baz through the Noor ‘Ala al-Darb program (TV program) , in which she said: ‘God knows how much I love you for the sake of Allah, and I ask you, our Sheikh, to offer me advice for the sake of Allah —just as you would advise one of your daughters regarding my religion and character. I hope for that.'”

 The Shaykh replied: ‘May Allah love you — He for whose sake you have loved us. Allah has informed us through the tongue of His Prophet (ﷺ) that those who love one another for His majesty are among the seven whom Allah will shade with His shade on the Day when there is no shade but His. The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Seven Allah will shade with His shade on the Day when there is no shade but His” — and among them he mentioned: “two men who loved one another for the sake of Allah, who came together upon that and parted upon it.” (1) And the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said: “Allah will say on the Day of Resurrection: Where are those who loved one another for My majesty? Today I shall shade them with My shade.” (2) For love for the sake of Allah is among the finest qualities of faith…’ (3)

As for the common people’s supplication ‘Allāhu yakhallīk’ — their intent is that Allah prolong his life and keep him as a treasure from whom his loved ones may benefit. A supplication with this intention is entirely lawful and praiseworthy.

And Allah Most High knows best.

────────────────────────────

Footnotes (Takhrīj):

(1) Recorded by al-Bukhārī in Kitāb al-Ādhān.

(2) Recorded by Muslim in Kitāb al-Birr wa-l-Ṣilah.

(3) Sh.Ibn Baal